"And there I thought," Carnivorous Cow blinked away a tear, dramatically, "that it was my smooth flanks, my dreamy eyes, my delicate hoofs.... But no! It's my unspent budget that's turned me into a man-magnet!"
"Mr Timberland again?" asked Gramsci, consolingly. Carnivorous Cow snorted, derisively.
"Dr Jersey stopped us in the road, commenting on the fact that we're always seen together. And instead of gallantly provoking his jealousy by acting smug, Mr Timberland revealed his true motives! Not even," she sobbed, "my incisive *mind*! Just... my... budget....!"
Gramsci tutt-tutted sympathetically. What were things coming to when people who seemed even to _like_ each other had a purely pecuniary interest in each other - nothing remotely physical? Why, they might as well be married!